Amarah's Corner: A message to my stepdad
Hi! My name is Amarah. Kids are important to me, and they’re important to Jesus, too.
Jesus said in Matthew 25:40 (KJV), “Whatever you’ve done unto the least of these (kids), you’ve done it unto me.”
“Kids like me” are kids and adults of all ages whose parents are, or were, drug addicts, and alcoholics; kids who have suffered, or who are suffering, abuse and neglect on multiple levels; and kids who are victims of bullying.
I‘m sick and tired of holding this stuff in. All of my life I’ve held it in but no more. People have no idea what kind of hell I went through with my mother’s addiction and the people she subjected me and my little sister to.
It’s my vision, my memories of the day Sarah left and the day my little sister was taken away. It’s a blur but I remember it nonetheless. And, I remember the day my former stepdad called and bragged about how the judge, “…just gave her to me! I couldn’t believe it! I didn’t have a job, I didn’t have a house and that car wasn’t even mine!” I remember telling the judge not to give my baby sister to him because he was one of my abusers but he gave her to him, anyway.
So, Andrew, do you remember the judge told you to let me see my little sister every year? Well, April, 2018, will be five years. Does it make you feel big and powerful and special not to let me see her? Does it make you feel worth something on this earth to finally have “power” - something you didn’t have on this earth when you were little because you were powerless, and had no control? Does it make you feel happy knowing I’m suffering by you not letting me see her? Do you have any idea how much I’ve suffered because of your insufferable doing? You’re also making my little sister suffer by not letting us see each other, but you obviously don’t care.
Sarah, the one that did the most hurt to you, and to me and my little sister, is the one you allow to take my little sister out-of-state for visits but you don’t let me see her at all. You’ve taken my little sister away from me to the point I don’t even remember her.
Is it fun for you and Sarah to watch me suffer? You have made me suffer enough. And when I was little and cried at night because I missed my grandmother you spanked me with a purple paddle til my legs and my behind went numb. Or when you punished me by making me hold heavy books on my arms that you made me extend straight out in front of me. And if the books fell I had to restart. Are you doing that to Ava, now? I’ll tell you this, I would go through that same stuff you put me through, again, rather than have my little sister go through it.
You have no idea how badly you affected my childhood and my life. The only thing good from your “marriage” with Sarah was my baby sister.
Christmas has just become another day thanks to you not letting me see my little sister. You don’t even let me send a gift to her yet you expect me to sound bright and cheery on the phone as if nothing is wrong.
And yet I thank you for being kind-of-a-dad sometimes because my father wasn’t. To be honest you’re the first abuser I’d forgive (I’m trying). As awful as you treated me you’re the one I hate the least.
Thank you, for reading my column. Write to me at Amarah’s “Kids Like Me” P.O. Box 354, Alamosa, CO 81101. If you know a kid like me, or parent, who is an addict/alcoholic, please tell him or her about “Amarah’s Corner, Kids Like Me” in the Valley Courier. Tell them to contact me, or you can contact me on their behalf. If you know a kid like me, or parent, who doesn’t have a Bible, but wants one, please, contact me. I’ll make sure he/she gets a Bible, “…and all the earth may know there is a God…” (1 Samuel 17:46, KJV).
Amarah’s “Kids Like Me” offers non-denominational World Bible School (WBS) Bible Correspondence Courses (free/postage paid) in English/Spanish to kids like me (ages 8-12), their parents, and even if you’re not a kid like me! Teens/adults take the WBS Master Series Courses so if you would like the WBS Courses, send your name/age/address and I’ll get you started ASAP! I hope to hear from you soon!
My goal is to help kids like me, and I want to help their parents, too. Until next time, remember, Jesus Loves You, and JESUS IS LORD!